I Fought The Lawn

Our family, like anyone’s, has house rules. While I’m of the firm belief that these rules must be enforced, I try to do them with as little venom as possible. It doesn’t really make much difference to Hailey and Liam, I guess, but while I’m sticking to my guns I’m not doing it to be mean. I’m sure the girl currently crying upstairs doesn’t really give a crap.

Hailey is crying because she won’t be joining us for dinner this evening. One of our foremost house rules states that if you complain about dinner, you won’t be having any. I started this rule a year or so ago when the kids were whining about not liking what Tania was serving. I believe Hailey has now paid the price of an empty stomach three times while Liam trails a close second with two. It’s helped us, and while I feel bad that Hack and Slash whine themselves out of a meal a few times a year, it’s cut out all complaining about dinner.

I thought I’d share our house rules here to see if any of you have similar or unique ones, or if you just think I’m bloody crazy for having these ones. Here they are:

 NO POTTY TALK AT THE TABLE. I don’t know why, but kids everywhere think talk about poop is pretty funny. You talk about it at the table, though, and you’re gone from it. You’re expected to put your plate on the counter and leave, and there’s nothing else for the rest of the night. This one came up because Tania can’t stand this kind of talk at dinner, and it seemed we couldn’t get through a meal without the word ‘poo’ coming up. It’s worked well for us.
 NO ELBOWS ON THE TABLE. You don’t get sent away for having elbows on the table, but you get told about them. I want the kids to have good table manners like I was taught, and elbows on the table is a big one for me… like chewing with your mouth open or talking with your mouth full. I cringe when they goto other people’s houses, wondering what they must think.

 NO AGENDA? FORGET YOUR HOMEWORK? YOU GET EXTRA HOMEWORK. The kids get agendas signed by the teachers to send home every day. If you don’t bring it home, we don’t know what kind of day you’ve had, and you’re getting a page of homework from our at-home homework books. If you forgot your homework, you’re getting homework from that book as well. The former was to get Liam to bring his agenda home [his teacher was commenting in it and he didn't want us to see]; the latter was to get them to bring their homework home [the idea being that if you're getting it at home, there's no sense leaving it at school and saying 'Oops, I forgot it.']

 KEEP YOUR ROOM CLEAN. As I tell the kids, I don’t care if you don’t clean your room, but you’re not doing other fun stuff until it’s clean. Basically, that means no going outside or playing with the neighbourhood kids until it’s cleaned up. They aren’t bad at keeping their rooms clean and clear, though they moan about having to do it.

Wow, I sound more like my dad every day.

- BC